There is a delicious irony that the title of the one Culture Club song I actively dislike is so apt for my first ever blog for LBWomen.
But perfect it is for this tale of two parts, starting with the professional stuff.

We have so many beautiful women in our community full of diverse talents, backgrounds and experiences with stories to tell and connections to be made. What is the most difficult part of experiencing this nirvana filled with these majestical ladies? It’s finding them! They are here in our day to day lives but it can be like plaiting fog trying to find them. One of our many talents is that we have a stealth-like camouflage from the world and our community. I challenge Sherlock himself to find a lady who likes ladies and be 100% sure of that fact without asking the question directly. There are places to go, events and sites where we will find pockets of our wonderful community, however, finding a diverse mix in one place can sometimes be tricky. In a world where technology is advancing at a rapid rate we are virtually connected to everyone across the globe, but our need for human connection will always be there. Experiencing connection in its rawest form will always have the chemistry to create those magical moments, where the universe nudges the right people in front of us at the right time. Where friends are made, business partners found and new ideas are formed. This may sound as cheesy as a John Lewis Christmas advert, but I bet you can remember that moment when you first met your best friend or someone who had a profound impact on your life, even if it was in a tiny nightclub toilet trying to fix your broken heel. Being visible in a world of assumed stereotypes and still embracing our own uniqueness is a balance in itself, embracing that wonderful part of us but not letting it define us. Short of wearing a “Nobody knows I’m a Lesbian” t-shirt on a daily basis, we still face navigating those oh-so-familiar clunky questions and find it very hard to spot others within our community. It can be a challenge to make your sexuality visible. Wearing a cheeky rainbow wristband, referencing pride or being a co-founder of an LGBT+ organisation can still be overlooked, and often we are labelled as something that couldn’t be the more polar opposite. Apparently, when meeting somebody for the first time, it takes 30 milliseconds to make a snap judgement. I’m pretty sure I can’t even sneeze that fast, let alone leave an impression on a person in that amount of time. I have an open mind and I embrace people for all of their uniqueness, and over many years of meeting different individuals, I am always taken aback by peoples stories. Admittedly, never in my 30 milliseconds of meeting someone new have I never got it right. So now, instead of guessing incorrectly, I just wait to hear their story, and I have never heard the same one twice. We have all had that moment where there are certain ladies that peak our “Gaydar” into overdrive and we start to look for any sign of confirmation. LB Women takes that camouflage away and provides a setting for a diverse group of women to come together to make those connections. We no longer have to navigate through those clunky questions to find out if they are “on our team” and instantly we feel relaxed knowing we have experienced similar challenges even if we have been on completely different journeys.

As the breadwinner in my family, it took me a long time to ‘come out as an entrepreneur’. Having a full-time job, I started my business Goodordering on the side and, for three years, I hustled and worked late nights and weekends to get the business to a point where I could quit my full-time job. One of the areas where lesbians are not traditionally supported is when we need to juggle many equal priorities at once. I never really realised how much I needed support until I met the team from LBWomen and was invited to take part in the WERKIN pilot program for mentoring. When I heard about the WERKIN app mentoring pilot program, I thought it was interesting because it involved technology (which I love) but also because it involved the potential for helping me and my business which, as a sole business owner, I craved. Having been teamed up with Emma Reynolds as my mentor, I was slightly over-excited and a bit starstruck. Obsessed with food, and a big fan of ramen and dumplings, I am a regular customer at several of her Tonkotsu restaurants. Plus, not only was she a business owner but she was also based in East London. The app was straightforward, easy to use and access a whole network of people in addition to my specifically assigned mentor, Emma. After phoning to arrange an introductory call, we met up for coffee and there was no wasted time before she started to ask vital questions like how can I help you? At the time we first met, I was considering opening a shop, and just needed someone else’s opinion and help with basic questions about dealing with property and what to ask the landlord. Emma was able to help with all of this and contacts that she shared with me for things like insurance saved me hours of research. Fast forward a few months, my shop is open and we are now looking for investment. Emma introduced me to a number of people who were really able to help me with advice and contacts. I realise that you can get to the same point without these contacts but it would have taken a lot longer and, for a business where cash flow is critical, time can make a huge difference. These days, I text Emma at least weekly with random questions and she always gets back to me. Meeting up with her once a month or two also gives me a lot of reassurance that there is someone I can run ideas by who is there to help. I am really grateful for the introduction through the app, and I would definitely be a mentor in the future so I can also give back and share my knowledge and contacts with someone else who might benefit from it.

Since 2010, when the Lord Davis report said that the lack of female faces on boards was simply not good enough, we have since seen FTSE companies scrambling to find top female talent to make up their numbers.

The Davies report was a great starting point, don’t get me wrong, it said we need to achieve 25% women at board level for our FTSE 100 companies within five years, and it achieved that.

A rainy day in London doesn’t start any better when the WhatsApp message is ‘Celebrating my birthday in Goa – who’s in?’. There began months of planning, ‘Marigold Hotel’ references, flight/hotel bookings and finally, we were off – Five go mad in Goa.

I have never had any yearning to go to Goa – it’s in my head a hippy’s hangout and somewhere already discovered. WRONG – we were about to go an adventure where I discovered a love of this Indian State which has me already planning to return.